Rare Portraits

By Cynatnite

Swallowing the hard lump in his throat, Hutch clasped his hands together in front of him, attempting to produce a relaxed, happy face. His partner of so many years, his life's blood, was now kissing his wife. Hutch should’ve been happy. Hell, he wished he could jump up and down for joy. But he couldn’t.

Starsky had not only managed to miraculously survive his near fatal shooting, but had rebounded with a new lease on life. Hutch was more than pleased his partner had come back to the job and they were once again back on the streets as before. He even liked the attractive resident Starsky was now married to.

After a humorous meeting in the hospital during Starsky’s recovery, the young physician had gotten his partner’s interest. Less than six months later, after a whirlwind romance, Starsky was now firmly committed to Miranda Grey. Miranda Starsky, Hutch mentally corrected.

Hutch’s heart swelled with jealousy as he watched the newlyweds tightly hold each other. He knew he’d fallen in love with Starsky. When it had happened, he had no idea, but seeing Starsky wake up in the hospital, Hutch was awakened by the feelings which had been within him all along. It had been his intention to let the man he loved in on the glorious secret, but after seeing the romance blossom between his partner and Miranda, Hutch shoved his swelling emotions deep inside.

He managed to balance his love for Starsky with the knowledge that maybe his partner had finally gotten his hands on the all-American dream. No one deserved happiness more than Starsky. Hutch was going to make sure that his partner got everything he deserved.

* * *

Glancing up from the piles of paperwork on his desk, Hutch watched Starsky raise his arms and stretch. A yawn filled his face and Hutch grimaced. Must’ve been some night. It was a morose thought and one Hutch put out of his mind. He loathed his jealousy. “Think you can stay awake long enough to finish your report?”

“Huh?” Starsky blinked his eyes. “Sorry. Just had a late night.”

“Just finish up, Starsk. I’m tired and want to go home.”

Seeing the foul look on Hutch’s face, Starsky leaned forward. “What’s got you so bitchy?”

Hutch kept his focus on the report in front of him and grabbed a pen. “Nothing. Long day." Starsky snorted and Hutch’s head snapped up. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

“It means that if you’d start getting out more, maybe your disposition would be better, Blondie.”

Rubbing his temple, Hutch said, “Don’t even think about it.”

“Hutch, Miranda’s friend is free and available. We’ll double date. We used to do it before.”

“Starsky, I’m just not interested." Hutch stood up and went to the filing cabinet. “Why do married people have the sudden urge to set up all their single friends?”

“Just want to see my best buddy happy,” Starsky responded with glee.

It was Hutch’s turn to snort. “You think since you’ve taken the plunge I should follow suit.”

“Do not,” Starsky argued.

Hutch pulled a file out of the cabinet and walked to his desk. He dropped it down and planted his hands on his hips. “You’ve got visions of us living next door to each other, with 2.5 kids each, and you borrowing my lawn mower without permission.”

Starsky stretched his hands upward and interlocked them behind his head. “It’s not a bad thing, Hutch.”

After sitting down, Hutch opened up the file. “It is when you’re taking the lawnmower without asking.”

“You think I’d do something like that?”

“Of course I do,” Hutch answered. “Just like the last time you set me up with that x-ray technician without asking.”

“If I don’t, who will?”

Hutch’s eyes locked with his partner’s. “Starsk, I would appreciate it if you would leave my social life alone.”

“The most social you’ve been since I got married was when I made you go with me and Miranda to buy a couch.”

Hutch rolled his eyes. “A trip I will not repeat, by the way.”

Rather than get into the couch discussion again, Starsky glanced at his watch. “Time to go.”

Both stood up and grabbed their jackets. As Hutch slipped his on, he asked, “Wanna go to Huggy’s?”

“Can’t. I told Miranda I would come home right after work today. Why not come over for dinner tonight?”

“Another time. I’ll work on my social life tonight at Huggy’s.”

“'Kay,” Starsky said.

Hutch trailed after Starsky out to the parking lot. He gave his partner a final wave before getting into his car. Hutch sighed and rubbed his eyes. The last thing he wanted to do was to witness wedded bliss between Starsky and his wife. Some days were harder than others.

Sometimes just seeing the wedding band attached to Starsky’s finger was enough to put him in a legalized depression for an entire day. The day it was slipped onto his partner’s finger was the day Hutch lost him. Rather than just make a pathetic attempt at going on with his life, Hutch took what little he could get from Starsky. Some days it was enough and still more than he ever hoped for. Others, it was almost physically painful to watch.

It was intentional on his part to keep his distance from them. Hutch could feel the jealousy churning like a wild storm whenever he watched Starsky with Miranda. Seeing how freely his partner was with his touches and kisses to his wife made Hutch feel like he was witnessing his own heart split in two.

* * *

When Starsky walked into the small two-bedroom house he shared with his wife, he could hear her movements in the kitchen. Slipping off his jacket, he walked into the kitchen, where he approached Miranda. After an affectionate kiss and hug, he headed to the fridge and retrieved a beer. He glanced over at his wife, admiring her small form. She stood over the stove, pushing her thick, dark blond curls away from her face.

Miranda glanced at Starsky. “I have to head back to the hospital later.”

“I thought you had tonight off?”

She covered the pot with a lid and turned around. “Alec came down with chicken pox, so I have to cover his shift.”

“Chicken pox? Isn’t that a prerequisite to being a kid?”

Miranda shrugged her shoulders. “Alec was never a kid.”

“He’s the one that says an only child has more advantages than one with siblings,” Starsky observed.

“Yep.”

Starsky took a drink of his beer and sighed. “I was hoping for a night to ourselves.”

Miranda gave him a small smile and turned back to the stove. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

She gave him a side-look. “You certainly try to hide it, Dave, but you’re doing a lousy job of it.”

“It’s Hutch.”

“What about him?”

He followed Miranda to the table and sat down. “He just seems…I don’t know…like he’s not completely happy.”

Miranda set a casserole in the middle of the table and slid into the chair next to Starsky's. “Is anyone?”

“I’m serious. Hutch is being distant and I don’t like it.”

“Dave, before we got married, you made sure I was aware of how important Hutch is to you. I knew it before that, but I accepted it and I still do. You also have to realize when we married, it meant Hutch would have to accept the changes.”

“I know, Mir." Starsky reached over and put a healthy portion of casserole on his plate. “Hutch has, I think.”

“Does it bother you that he’s not around like he used to be?”

“It’s part of it. I miss him sometimes,” Starsky admitted.

“We’ve been married less than four months. He’s probably giving us some time as newlyweds.”

“Makes sense,” Starsky muttered. He played with his fork and looked at Miranda. “Did you tell me that Gwen wasn’t seeing anyone?”

“Dave,” Miranda groaned. “I don’t think Hutch wants you setting him up.”

“Hutch doesn’t know what he wants,” Starsky matter-of-factly stated. “I think you should talk to her.”

“You won’t let this go, will you?”

“Nope,” Starsky said with a grin.

“Fine, but I’m not doing it any time soon. I want to make sure he forgets about the x-ray tech.”

“Well, in that case, let’s go out this weekend and take him with us.”

“Sure,” Miranda replied. “That new club you’ve been telling me about?”

Starsky gave a wide smile before diving into dinner.

* * *

Later that night, Hutch walked into his apartment and headed straight for the fridge. He pulled out a beer and made his way to the greenhouse. The first thing to catch his eye was the far corner, where there were the small makings of an art studio.

Many lonely nights Hutch found comfort in his music and art. Seeing the half-finished painting on the stand, Hutch moved closer. Normally, his work was impressionistic in style, but lately, realism offered much in the way of solace. It was because of Starsky.

In order to find a little release, he painted his lovable partner. Putting Starsky’s expressive face on canvas was almost satisfying. With a sad smile he picked up the painting. Starsky was looking out of the corner of his eye and a half-grin jumped out at him. There has to be a thousand different Starsky looks, Hutch thought. Someday, he might paint them all.

* * *

Hutch walked through the disco to the table where Miranda sat. He put a drink in front of her and eased into the chair next to her.

“Thanks.”

“Sure." Hutch sipped his beer and his eyes went out to the dance floor where Starsky was dancing with another girl. It always amazed him how comfortable Starsky moved with the music. It was something he wished he could do as well. He glanced at Miranda. “Why doesn’t it bother you?”

“What?” Miranda asked over the music.

He motioned towards the dance floor. “Starsky dancing with another woman.”

“Oh,” she responded. “Dave loves to dance. I like it sometimes, but I prefer watching him enjoy himself.”

“He does,” Hutch said with an admiring smile.

“The slow ones are mine,” Miranda said with an added wink.

Hutch chuckled a little and focused back on the dance floor to his partner. He shifted in his seat as Starsky undulated on the dance floor. “He talked to you about me.”

Miranda looked at Hutch, then down at her drink. “He’s worried.”

“Like a mother hen,” Hutch sighed.

“I don’t think he’s convinced you’ve adjusted to our marriage.”

Hutch shrugged his shoulders. “I have to admit it’s been a big change.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well." Hutch took a large drink of his beer. “We only had each other for a long time.”

Looking down at his beer, Hutch didn’t see the confused look in Miranda’s face and before either could speak, Starsky came over during a lull in the music. “This slow one’s yours, beautiful,” he said with a grin.

Miranda laughed and took Starsky’s hand. Hutch’s grip on the bottle tightened as he watched Starsky lead Miranda out on the dance floor. He prayed for the evening to end. If it had been possible to get out of this tonight, Hutch would have. Starsky damn near made it impossible to say no.

* * *

Two weeks later, Hutch sat in the Torino, shaking his head. “No. Just forget it, Starsk.”

“Come on, Hutch. It's one dinner. You can do one dinner.”

Hutch’s eyes moved to Starsky, who was driving this time around. “And I said I won’t have you setting me up.”

“I’m not.”

“What do you call it? Miranda is inviting a friend who just so happens to be a single woman and you’re going to have me, a single man, there.”

Starsky stole a nervous glance at Hutch. “It’s a get-acquainted dinner. If you don’t like her, you don’t have to ask her out.”

“Starsky, it’s a classic set-up. I don’t need it and I don’t want it.”

The firm tone would have dissuaded most people, but Starsky refused to give in. “Awe, come on, Hutch. This is a friend of Miranda’s and I think she’d feel a little uncomfortable showing up as a third wheel.”

“Don’t do that,” Hutch warned with a point of his finger. “Don’t manipulate me, buddy.”

“Then say you’ll do it, and I won’t have to.”

Frustrated, Hutch ran his hand through his hair. “You’re not going to let this go, are you?”

Starsky smiled smugly. “Not in this lifetime, baby blue.”

A tingle went through Hutch’s insides. Starsky’s teasing voice calling him the affectionate nickname always brought a smile to his heart. He wanted nothing more than to ruffle his partner's thick dark curls at that moment. Hutch put on his most stern look. “Fine, I’ll do it, but don’t ever ask me again.”

The rest of the day, Starsky grinned like kid who knew what he was getting for Christmas and Hutch found himself enjoying it more than he thought he would. He loved it when his partner brought out the best in him.

* * *

That weekend, Hutch showed up at Starsky’s with a bottle of wine. He gave his partner a ‘you better not mess this up’ look, and Starsky reassured him with a gentle pat on the shoulder as he guided him into the living room. “Hutch, this is Gwen Carmichael.”

Hutch gave a nervous smile and held his hand out. “Stars…Dave’s told me a lot about you.”

The woman stood and Hutch was a little surprised that she was almost as tall as he. From her short dark hair to the conservative outfit she wore, he could tell at a glance this was a woman he normally wouldn’t approach. He reminded himself that appearances could be deceiving as he shook her hand. He might actually like her.

“Miranda speaks very highly of you,” Gwen said.

Starsky stepped forward and took the bottle from Hutch. “Why don’t you two get acquainted and I’ll open the wine?”

Before Hutch could offer to help, Starsky was out of the living room and in the kitchen with Miranda. He motioned toward the couch where he and Gwen sat and exchanged small talk. Starsky soon returned with two glasses of wine, much to Hutch’s relief.

After more conversation, the two couples sat down at the table for dinner. Hutch almost rolled his eyes at Starsky, who insisted on the boy/girl seating arrangement. As they ate, Starsky took the opportunity to try to bring Hutch and Gwen onto some common ground.

“Gwen, Miranda said that you’re looking at specializing in pediatrics. Hutch is a Big Brother to two kids. Molly and Kiko.”

“Admirable,” Gwen replied with cool eyes. “It’s rare that adults take an interest in children.”

“My partner may deny it, but he does like kids.”

“Starsk,” Hutch scolded, “I’ve never said I didn’t like kids.”

“Children need a positive role model,” Gwen interjected. “There’s so few these days.”

“Molly and Kiko haven’t had a father in their lives and I like to think I’m helping a little on that end." Hutch took a drink of wine. “Why did you decide on pediatrics?”

“It’s a field where I can do the most good. I also plan to be board certified in obstetrics,” Gwen answered.

Starsky lifted his glass and smiled. “That’s great, Gwen. Isn’t it, Hutch?”

“Yeah,” Hutch said with a weak smile. He turned to Gwen. “Don’t you have to pick one to specialize in?”

“Not necessarily, Hutch,” Miranda offered. “Many doctors choose to be board certified in more than one field.”

“Have you decided how you will focus your attentions once your residency is complete?” Hutch asked Gwen.

“Yes." Gwen lifted her chin and with a satisfied look, said, “The Moral Majority is sponsoring a clinic I plan on practicing in.”

“Really?” Hutch shot a look at his partner, who only shrugged his shoulders.

Gwen let out a small laugh. “I can see the disdain in your eyes.”

“It’s not that you see,” Hutch answered.

“You don’t care for the Moral Majority.”

“I think everyone has a right to worship how they see fit and I also think people have a right to live their lives as they choose as long as it doesn’t harm others.”

“True,” Gwen conceded. “But the lives that some live do have a negative impact, no matter how much they feel it doesn’t affect others.”

“What aspect are you referring to?” Hutch asked.

Starsky grabbed the bottle and held it up. “More wine?”

Ignoring the question, Gwen picked up her napkin and wiped her mouth. “Disco.”

A bark of laughter escaped Hutch and he shook his head. “Are you serious?”

“Very serious,” Gwen answered with confidence. “The lewd and lascivious dancing leads not only to unprotected sex outside of marriage, but also to drugs and alcohol abuse. It’s a vicious cycle, as I’m sure you’re well aware, given your profession.”

Hutch couldn’t believe his ears. “Starsky’s a disco maniac, yet he’s not a drug addict and has stayed very faithful to his wife.”

“David is the exception to the rule.”

“So, you and your people want to stop disco now?”

“Of course not.” Gwen’s laugh was filled with condescension. “Censorship is unrealistic for this country, no matter how vile the message is. Our country has forgotten its moral center and because of that, it's on a steady decline. Bringing back prayer in schools and sticking to those traditional values which made our country great in the first place is how we can begin to get back on track.”

“Whose track is that?” Hutch leaned forward. “Other people making decisions about someone’s personal life and how they lead it, doesn’t sound very American to me.”

“I decided on pediatrics and obstetrics because it’s the children who are our future. It’s in the early years, where we can make the most impact and future generations can make this country right.”

Hutch thought for a moment before saying anything. “Let me ask you this. How do you and your group intend to do this?”

“I plan on working in one of the clinics that offers medical care to those who otherwise couldn’t afford it. I will also be offering Christian-oriented classes and seminars. Then I plan on starting an abstinence program for teenagers and teaching unwed mothers the value of marriage.”

With a quick look at Starsky, Hutch saw the dread in his partner’s eyes. He moved his eyes back to Gwen. “Abstinence and the value of marriage. A conservative approach to problems you haven’t the first clue about.”

“It’s much better than the alternatives.”

“Kids are having sex at a record pace for a variety of reasons. Slapping abstinence on them isn’t going to slow down teenagers who want to do what they want to do. Educating them about birth control and condoms in addition to abstinence offers alternatives they might not get at home. It’s not the fifties where good kids wait 'til marriage.”

“Birth control just gives them permission,” Gwen said with a roll of their eyes.

“Lady,” Hutch said, trying to get a handle on his temper, “they don’t need our permission. If you haven’t noticed, they’re already having sex, and rolling back the clock to the good ol' days ain’t gonna change that.”

“Honey, pass the potatoes,” Starsky meekly said.

“The reality is that abstinence works,” Gwen stated. “Name one person who was harmed by it.”

“Anita Bryant!”

Starsky covered his eyes.

“Even with the liberal use of birth control and condoms, unwanted pregnancies are rampant and murderers are perpetuating it!”

Hutch was flabbergasted at what he was hearing. “Murderers? Where in the hell did that come from?”

“So-called doctors who perform abortions! They are killing babies and you, a police officer, just sit and let it happen!”

“When the laws change, we’ll arrest them. Otherwise, you’ll just have to hold up your signs outside of an abortion clinic. Until you walk a mile in their shoes, you don’t have any room to talk.”

“I’m talking about saving lives here and you’re going to use that pathetic liberal excuse that it’s okay to kill innocent babies?”

“Abortion is something neither of us will ever agree on,” Hutch pressed. “But when a man rapes a woman or the mother is at risk, that’s when it is necessary.”

“God’s will,” Gwen stated.

“What?” Hutch was floored.

“When a child is created, it is by God’s will. No one outside of that has any right to determine who lives and who dies except God.”

“Even at the risk of someone’s life?” Starsky asked.

“Sadly, yes.”

“I don’t believe this,” Hutch muttered. He stood up and looked down at Gwen. “Tell Barbara Pennington that it was God’s will that a man raped her 11-year-old daughter before murdering her. God had nothing to do with it, lady.”

Hutch headed for the door and Starsky caught him before he left. “Hutch....”

“Never again, Starsk."

Starsky watched Hutch leave and slowly turned around to look at the woman who had driven his partner away. When he moved his gaze to Miranda, he could see the sympathy in her eyes.

* * *

Starsky jerked off his shirt and tossed it onto a nearby chair. He barely glanced at Miranda, who was slipping a large t-shirt on. “Why didn’t you tell me she was like that?” he asked.

“I had no idea she was so conservative, Dave." Miranda bent over the bed and pulled down the covers. “If I had, I certainly wouldn’t have brought her here.”

“I should’ve met her before setting Hutch up with her.”

“It’s not your fault,” Miranda offered.

Starsky slipped his jeans off and walked over to the bed. “How can that woman be a doctor and proclaim God’s will all in the same breath?”

“Gwen believes that she was given a gift and she’ll use it how she sees best. Whether you agree with her views or not, she is an excellent doctor.”

“You defending her?”

“You asked and I answered!”

Starsky sighed and sat down on the bed. “Sorry, I just feel bad about how this dinner turned out.”

“I know, honey. Let’s go to bed.”

Looking over at Miranda, who was under the covers, Starsky said, “It’ll be Christmas before I get Hutch over here again. It took a hell of a lot to convince him to go along with this, let alone come here.”

“Just let it go for tonight, Dave. The damage has been done. Tomorrow you can make it right with Hutch.”

“Yeah,” Starsky agreed.